Saturday, November 04, 2006

I saw her today

Sarahs biomom. Walking down a busy road. At first I had to do a double take. I had thought she was living in a totally different town. I pulled a U-turn and checked her out again... Then---something overtook me. I pulled over about a block ahead of her....and waited....

When she got closer I got out of my car. She recognized me instantly. She ran over and gave me a hug. We started talking a mile a minute. It was amazing. She told me she is doing well--says she has been sober for almost a year. Gosh I hope so....I would love to believe that for her and Sarahs sake.

We chatted and caught up for at least 30 minutes. I got her new address. I gave her one of Sarahs school pictures from my wallet--and promised to send more next week.

Overall she looked good. She seems to be trying. I had Sarahs halloween costume in my backseat still and I showed it to her. It broke my heart when she asked to smell it. She wanted to see what Sarah smelled like she said. She talked alot about God. She told me before she had Sarah god had told her that she wasn't this babys mommy. She said when she first met me--she knew I was Sarahs mommy. She seems to dealing well with the loss of adoption--as well as anyone in her situation could I guess.

I knew it was fate that I happened to run into her. She has been on my mind constantly the last few weeks. I was having issues with closure of some sort. Every night Sarah and I have a bedtime routine. She has this waterglobe on her dresser with 2 angels inside. Every night I wind it up and ask Sarah to kiss the angels goodnight. Well her bio-maternal grandma died during Hurricane Charley--a few days after Sarah was born. So she never got to meet her. So kissing the angels is a way I was hoping to incorporate the story of her late grandma. But I did not know the womans name.. It was really bothering me. I subscribed to local newspapers archives hoping to find the name of her grandma--thinking it would be listed with Charley fatalities...Nope...

Today I found out her name was Delores. But she went by "Dee-Dee".
Now the truly amazing part of this story for me--Sarah has a pink teddy bear we bought her when she was in the hospital when she was 6 months old. We called him "mr Pinky" or "Pinky". When Sarah started to talk she renamed him...."Dee-Dee"....I really believe her grandma is here and looking out for her...there have been a few other things that have happened that make me think that--but regardless I think it is a precious link to her grandma....

6 comments:

DramaQueen said...

Wow...that is so amazing that you just happened to see her walking down the street...I'm so proud of you for being so brave to sit and talk with her for a little while...what a neat post!

MamaKBear said...

THAT is awesome! Especially the part about Sara calling the bear "DeeDee".

I hope you found a measure of peace in your chance encounter with biomom. :)

Julie said...

that is amazing- and gave me chills- I am so glad you saw her mom and stopped to talk. I am very glad she is doing well!!! I hope she continues on that path and someday can meet Sarah as an adult. Thanks for sharing!

The Imperfect Christian said...

I can't wait to see LittleBit's mom at her adoption finalization! What an awesome situation that you were in the right place at the right time. I'm glad she's doing well, I often think of DramaChild's mom and hope she, too, is doing better!

kim.kim said...

She seemed to be dealing well with the loss of adoption?

That's not how I see it. Poor woman is completely traumatised.

Thank God you are a kind person, and good for her having a year sober.

kim.kim said...

I want to know why Julie thinks it's ok that Sarah's mother should wait for her to be an adult? Why should Sarah wait to be an adult to meet her mother?

Do any of you read reunion blogs? Reunion is a very emotionally overwhelming experience to go through. My daughter said to me she wished we'd had contact while she was growing up so that she hadn't had to go through the stress of reunion.